Thursday, February 21, 2008

bloggen

That's German for "blog" or "blogging" or something.

I don't have anything in particular to say, but I just have the urge to write. Or avoid my statistics homework like the plague. My classes this semester are going really well, except for Statistics, excuse me, "Experimental Design," but it's just a wolf in sheep's clothing. We have a midterm in two weeks and I'm scared. Maybe that fear will motivate me to catch up on my homework.

Life is good. Ok, life is great :) I've had a couple of rough patches and some stressful days, and I'm often really tired at the end of the day, but it's a good kind of tired. The kind of tired when you know that you've accomplished some things and enjoyed yourself and will wake up the next morning ready to go at it again. I see four clients a week, and I'm learning a lot about counseling, and learning a lot about myself. My supervisor is awesome, and he's good at pointing out things about myself. "Therapist, know thyself," someone important or famous or smart said one time. I've been eating more.* I go to yoga classes sometimes, which makes me feel more alive. I focus on my breathing sometimes. I listen to BBC radio sometimes. I listen to great music on Ruckus. I went to see Flogging Molly in Austin a couple of weeks ago, and I think I'm going to a concert with Cara over spring break.

I have a new roommate who's really nice and easy to talk to, and my old roommate and I have gotten to hang out some. Lost is back on television! Other than Lost, I don't really watch much tv, though maybe I'll start watching The Office when it comes back in April and May. Cutting down my internet time has been a wise decision. I don't miss using it when I'm at home, though when I'm at work, it's hard for me to tear myself away from the computer. I've been reading Luke, and thinking more about what Jesus had to say. I've been thinking lately in the metaphors of light and darkness. Basically, things should be out in the light, we should be more honest and open with ourselves and others. There's no place for secrecy, especially not in the church. My church has been really good about encouraging this openness. A few weeks ago, our pastor attacked the statement, "That's just between me and the Lord," saying that it's a lie, there's nothing that's just between us and God. God wants us to confess to others and seek counsel. And I believe it. I want to live my life in the light. I don't want any darkness, any secrets, any shame. I want to be open, honest, genuine, congruent, in the light.

My church has also been talking a lot about marriage, sex, and dating. And we're really listening. Coincidingly, I've started spending some time with a certain young man from church, and we have a date tomorrow. It's good, it's great actually, we're having lots of fun, we like each other, we're getting to know each other, he's being intentional about things, we're being open about it, we're friends with a married couple who we've talked to about it, and we'll see where things go :) It's so early, I guess we've been hanging out for almost a month now, but I feel like so far we're off to a great start. He's really neat, I think you'd really enjoy him. I'm really really excited about this and I feel really good about how things are going. How many times can I say "really" in this paragraph? In addition to this young man, I feel more connected to the people at my church. I've been meeting lots of people my age, and having fun hanging out with them on weekends, and I've been spending more time with some families I know too. I feel more included, I feel supported, and even protected. I don't think I've ever felt protected by a church group before, but I feel safe and secure and I trust them.

I think I'm going to Boston this summer for the APA Convention. I've never been to Boston, and it's APA. It's kinda a big deal, even though I'm not presenting anything, I can learn a lot and meet lots of folks. And next summer, I might go to Costa Rica. That's right, Costa Rica. Last semester, we talked to our faculty about putting together a study abroad program for us. They jumped on the idea, and have submitted a proposal for our department head or dean or someone to approve and possibly get funding. So, if all goes well, we're going to Costa Rica for part of next summer, to take some courses, study Spanish, live with host families . . . it's pretty amazing on many levels. It's pretty rare for graduate programs to offer any type of study abroad program, and this was our cohort's idea, and they listened to us and are working to make it happen.

So yeah, life is good. Life is great! I haven't written as much lately, and I just wanted to update you guys, my friends and readers, and let you know what's new in my world.



*That's an odd statement. Let me explain. I love to eat. I don't have disordered eating, there were just times last semester when I would get busy and stressed and lazy and forget to eat. I lost some weight, but gained it back over Christmas break. Now, I pack my lunchbox full every night and make sure that I have plenty to eat during the day.

3 comments:

Ben said...

I'd translate it as "to blog," actually (most words ending in "-en" are verb infinitives).

Could also be a noun for "blogging" if you capitalized it ("das Bloggen"). I don't know what the gender of "Blog" is.

if walled in climb up said...

That's great you're learning so much and loving life.

Knowing oneself and honesty in all things have been themes for me lately in my life, so I can relate. I find that I'm generally happier when I'm open about who I am. Most of the time, it seems like secrets are motivated by fear--you fear what people will think of you so you don't divulge the whole truth or aren't genuine about who you are. If we really thought about this, though, we'd find it stems from a deeper lack certainty of whether we accept ourselves or not. In my opinion, if we have to have other people's opinions about us, then we haven't really formed our own, or are afraid our own aren't valid.

I'm glad you're committed to being who you really are, even in the sometimes harsh light of others' view.

Cara said...

Kelly, you deserve the happiness you have found this semester.

I hadn't read about your new roommate until now; that's really cool.

Eeee!! Kelly Pie, the boy news is of course the most exciting for me to read about, and I'm so glad I've been able to hear about it over the phone and through email. Oh, boys... They're great.

Boston!
Costa Rica!

You really are living the life.

Love,
Carapie